Bruery Provisions Cornballer isn't as...a-maize-ing...as I hoped

The day has finally come that Nick G can make it to The Bruery. This man is one of the biggest fans of this heavenly beer and now, he pilgrimages to his Mecca. What's the occasion? He and AJ share a birthday and to celebrate, we're doing a brewery tour. We're joining several of Nick's coworkers as well as Karl who is coming up from Temucla after wine tasting, if he's still vertical. On the way up, we listen to a birthday mix I made for Nick and AJ and in case you were wondering, Oingo Boingo was definitely on it. The video is one of Danny Elfman's finest moments -

The timing of this trip is excellent, because according to The Bruery newsletter, they're releasing their fifth and latest Provisions Series batch today (Provisions is a limited one time only release) AND Bootleggers Brewery is releasing their greatest creation ever, the very limited release Knuckle Sandwich DIPA. Victory is ours!

Best Friends and Beard Brothers - at least that's what it says on our eharmony profile

Going brewery tasting is fun for the obvious reasons, but this trip doubles the fun for me because all the people except for Nick know nothing about The Breury or Bootleggers, so I'm allowed to ramble on and wave my hands uncontrollably while explaining everything I know about their beer. Imagine if you gave a 10 year old kid Redbull and a plate of cookies and that's how excited I am. Finally, someone clubs me over the head like a baby seal and my I shift my focus to the beer of the day, the Cornballer.

Bruery has some pretty great names for their specialty brews (Gunga Galunga, a Caddy Shack reference, being the best) and this one brings back fond memories of infomercials from Arrested Development (unfortunately the above is the best I can find)

And let me tell you how much I enjoyed it...eeeeeeee not so much -

Eat sink, cornballer (I didn't flush it, but God I wanted to)

I love The Bruery. I have been there four times. I own two growlers. I have several of their beers saved under my bed. I even own a shirt and will probably buy a hat next trip. Yay merchandising. I'll probably name my second born son Mischief after their finest brew, but this beer makes me cringe.

The Cornballer is their attempt at a malt liquor and it's 50% of it is made out of corn and the other 50% made out of 6 Row Malt (2 Row Malt is typically used to make beer). It smells like citrus hops mixed with a mildew sock. It tastes similar, with a dash of sourness. There's just something rotten about it. Everyone except for Karl agrees with me. Karl likes this, but he's also high on mescaline and wine.  I love so much about brewery, but not this. This was hard as a horse to put down. I never thought I would bestow the worst rating to a Bruery beer, but stranger things have happened. PEARL HARBOR rating Thanks goodness they still have the Cuadruple on tap, because I'm gonna need a 'forget me now' after this one.

On another note, happy birthday Nick and AJ! I've known them both for over 9 years and they're my two favorite people and I wish them the best birthday and in the year to come!

 

I bought a Loakal Red and a Cuadruple to add to my cellar/bed collection. Nick G went certifiably awesome and bought a CASE of Bruery beer, a baker's dozen to be exact. On a side note, he will soon be the proud owner of a shotgun. Who has two thumbs and can't wait to combine both? THIS GUY