Russian River Supplication Sour Ale turns tongues inside out on our Napa Valley trip

First day in Napa! We're here with over 16 people and staying at the same hotel as we did for my parent's 40th wedding anniversary 3 years ago, the Wine Country Inn http://www.winecountryinn.com/. I'm reallly excited about the wine and all, but the breakfast at this place is AMAZING. Make your own waffles with peanut butter and nutella and a rotating eggs casserole every morning that is to die for. Everything one needs for a good wine drinking base.

This post will be mostly pictures and the beer review at the end. Now why did Walker wait until the end of the night after drinking wine all day to drink his Russian River beer? Hmmm...is it because it was a sour ale? Mayhaps

Parents rule

Dudes rule

Miner winery has a wild yeast chardonnay, which creates a flavor profile similar to that of a wild yeast beer. Interwesting...

This is Napa on a bad day...psych, Napa doesn't have bad days fool.

This castle was fun and all, but the wine was blah. It was like going to Disneyland only to realize that Star Tours was broken after you waited in line for 45 minutes. And then a bird pooped on you.

So I'm very excited about this trip, because not only are the wines amazing, but the beer is rated highly too. Russian River makes amazing beers IPA's and Sour Ales, although I really detest Sours. All but one sour I've ever tasted made me want to write a strongly worded letter asking why they would want to put those particular flavors in someone's mouth. Tonight's beer, Russian River Supplication, is one of the highest rated sours in the world and since I'm in Napa, near Russian River, I feel compelled to heed the Sour's Siren Song.

The Supplication is a Brown Ale aged in French oak Pinot Noir barrels with three strains of Brettanomyces, Lactobacillus, Pediococcus and sour cherries. The whole gang is outside here tasting the beer. A few like sour candy, etc and somewhat like this. Others think I just poured them a cup of panther piss.They're accusing me of shenanigans but I tell them "I said that you should try this, not that it was a good." Ha. Now they know what a sour ale tastes like. Some things really have to be experienced.

I'm getting used to it, but IT IS SO OVERWHELMING. WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ANYTHING THAT SOUR THIS INTENSE. Imagine Emril saying "BAM" while kicking you in the balls while jamming sour starburst on steroids into your mouth over and over again.

Here is the Beer Advocate review, which rates it as an A. If you might like a sour ale, this review is for you because I can't say anything, good or bad, other than what I wrote. It's just too wild:  http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/863/22227/?ba=bros


The good news is, I also bought Russian River Pliny the Elder for my dad and others, who LOVES IT. It makes me very happy to see my dad enjoy beer so much. We're sitting out on a deck above a winery under a cloudy night drinking great beer and wine. This is an amazing.

I'm afraid to rate this beer, because it's so well regarded but I hated it so very much. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating? Nuts

Rogue Chipotle Ale comes with a warning

David received a huge 55 inch TV that he ordered today and the box's sign feels appropriate for this beer.

What is interesting about the reviews online, is how mixed they are. People are either saying the chipotle is over used or under used (spicy or not spicy enough). David and I aren't on the same page as everyone else. In fact, we can't even get far enough into the beer to analyze it because we want to hurl it out the window.

We don't like this at all, in fact, it's downright inappropriate. Maybe we have a bad bottle, but the chipotle is bitter and akin to donkey piss. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating

Stone's Smoked Porter with Chipotle is worlds better, try that beer instead if you want something with a little kick.

Iron Fist Golden Age can't top Hall & Oates

Every once in a while, a bad apple comes along - a 'corked' wine bottle, a lemon car, the latest carnation of the Hawaii 5-0 televisions show. The beer world is not immune to failure and in pouring Iron Fist's Golden Age, David and I realized that at some point, this beer had crossed over from being a delicious and refreshing treat to something that needed to be poured out.

It's 9.5% alcohol but the only defining characteristic is an overwhelming yeasty flavor. David looked up other reviews and confirmed our suspicion that it was a bad bottle, because this brew had solid reviews and fail to mention yeast. Bad batches happen from time to time. This was especially hard to drink entirely because the yeast flavor Dominated. Yuck. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating. 

But I'm not letting a bad beer get in the way of a good time, because David, Karl and Laura are all going to The Hollywood Bowl to watch Hall & Oates belt out their smooth and easy sounds. Take me away Daryl!

If there is one thing Karl and Laura know how to do, it is picnic the Hollywood Bowl. They brought 5 different kinds of cheese, 4 different kinds of deli meat, baguettes and 2 types of crackers. Combined we had 4 bottles of wine, a bottle of Bruery Mischief and a bottle of port. We picnic'd the hell out of that place.

Here is Maneater, which was the best quality video I took. The saxophone player just kills it and women who loved saxophone players who look like Meatloaf with a pony tail were SWOONING:

Afterward, the Hollywood Orchestra, led by their hilarious conductor, closed the show down playing patriotic tunes with choreographed fireworks. Ahhhmazing. Probably one of the best nights of my year! Lovin it

Widmer Bros Hefeweizen might pass as contaminated Bavarian Water

When you have nothing good to say about someone, my mother told me not to say it. Unfortunately, I have a blog so I'm inclined to yell it from the top of the webosphere but keep it brief.

With David gone, I'm scrambling to find single beers in the house and there's only one I could find, a Widmer Hefe that David 'borrowed' from a Red Bull event and brought back to the house. Kudos roomie. However, this was worse than I expected. I thought this might taste like a bad beer. Instead it tastes like water that's watered down with German yeast.  There are several American made commercial hefeweizens out there, don't try this one. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating

Hermitage Ale of the Hermit should return from whence he came

A lot of people buy wine bottles solely based on the wine label. I suppose if you know nothing about wine then go with what's pretty, right? I followed suit in selecting this beer. There's a funny little man on front label with scoliosis. He probably made this beer to help pay for his mdeical bills, which practically makes me a humanitarian...in some alter-reality.

The Ale of the Hermit is pretty malty and has the qualities of an amber or brown ale. This reminds me of an ale my college friend Fuentes would drink. He likes brown ales and also dressed up as a Mexican Hobbit one Halloween. I feel like this brew is more a Bilbo than a Frodo. There isn't much here though (nothing against hobbits, of course). The Island rating.

Upon further investigation online, I discover it's a Double IPA. What the nards? David and I both thought this was a brown or amber ale, or even possibly a Scottish beer. That was coming from two people who drink a shameful amount of IPA's and they didn't guess that this is a DOUBLE IPA!

Apparently hermits are very confused about style, beer and fashion wise. This hermit probably wears 80's parachute pants with an Native American Headdress, like MC Hammer on Mescaline. Speaking of crazy, he also apparently he makes an IPA that exudes few IPA characteristics. This hermit is insulting to every other recluse. Boo, go back to your cave dwelling Downgraded to TRANSFORMERS 2.

Now OBI-WON KENOBI, he was a hermit!

Ballast Point Wahoo Wheat relies on it's good looks alone

I'm attending my first company movie premiere tomorrow night and I brought out this gem as a reminder as I pick out my shirt and suit:

In searching for beers that are of the American Wheat style, I only found a few, and this is one of them. I plan on brewing a summertime honey wheat this weekend and wanted to brush up on the style but unfortunately, this isn't a beer I want to copy.

Smelling it, I realize it's been a while since we've tasted a wheat and it smells good. I love that sweet-doughy-orange smell. The body is light light orange color. The taste doesn't live up to the smell however, and the Wahoo is rather lackluster. With this style of beer, I'm looking for drinkability. How many would of these do I want in the hammock? The answer doesn't inspire a future purchase. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating

Allgauer Teutsch Pilsner is the base for a Hollywood night

In Westwood with Jamie pre-partying for a bus ride in the cold rain to Hollywood for a going away party. Gonna be interesting, gonna be great!

This pilsner isn't that clear, it's a little bitter and over all it's not that great. But it was cheap, what did I expect? TRANSFORMERS 2 rating, don't waste your time - there are much better pilsners out there. 


...A quote from later on...The bus driver told us, "didn't know stars rode his bus." Ha totally, he's so right. How did he know I was famous Lesson learned, wear a sport coat and you'll get compliments on buses.

Widmer Brothers Brrr Seasonal Ale should be used as a penalty drink in our Kings game

We're playing an epic transcontinental game of KINGS up in Big Bear with Abrye (in Australia) after a great day at Big Bear and Snow Summit. Whoever pulls a king has to take a shot and fire the trick pistol, which electrocutes you. It's so strong that each person who has tries it immediately flings the pistol across the table. It really sucks. Thanks Jay!

The Widmer Brrr Seasonal ale has a TON of spices. It's as close as I will get to chewing a bag of all spice, cinnamon and nutmeg. I'm not enjoying this at all, in fact, it's going down as a TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

Aaron B however, prefers this over the Infinium that David opened up as his beer of the day, so to each his own.

Lagunitas Brown Shugga', more like Mashugana

Tomorrow is David's Christmas office party and as his esteemed +1, I will be attending as well. My plan is to walk the delicate line between dance floor drinking and not making David regret his generosity. Unfortunately, these parties don't typically have carry quality craft beer, so we're having our Friday beer at 12:01am (Thursday night/morning) while watching the 30 Rock Christmas Special, which isn't meeting expectations.

Tina Fey is Awesome

I took a couple sips of the Brown Shugga' and turned to David, "Weird stuff huh?" he nodded tersely. Agreed. It's a brown ale that is both sweet and bitter with hints of vanilla, but neither element mix well together.On a positive note, I'm also eating the biggest damn pistachios I ever laid fingertips on. Enormously delicious, the beer, not so much. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

PUMPKIN ALE WEEK! Buffalo Bill's Pumpkin Ale

We are counting down the days to All Hallow's Eve with a week of Pumpkin Beers! Who will rise above the seasonal pack? America's Original from Buffalo Bill's Brewery? NOPE.

Yeah, not so much.

I guess the tag 'America's Original' must count for something when it comes to marketing, but with taste nothing is original about Mr. Bill's Pumpkin Ale. Being light on both spices and pumpkin doesn't help its mediocrity. If this was part of a blind taste test, there's the off-hand chance I'd confuse this with Sam Adams' crustier, vagabond brother. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

Crossing my fingers for better luck with tomorrow's selection. Being from Texas and now living in LA, the season known as "Fall" is a word I hear but never seen. My hope for the week is to discover a brew with the right amount of pumpkin and spice that will transport me to a place where the seasons actually change. Here's to swimming with bow-legged women.

The Bruery Autumn Maple wasn't the nightcap I hoped for

Cleaned up the weekend's mess around the apartment and celebrated our 15 minutes of courage by drinking a highly anticipated brew and checking out highly anticipated pictures from the weekend (which I was ecstatic to view because I couldn't find my camera and thought I'd left it on an LA Metro bus. But cleaning out my room yielded the camera under my cookie monster shirt, score!)

There might have been some incriminating photos...

This is a very unique fall seasonal beer made with 17 lbs. of yams per barrel (crickies!) and brewed with cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, vanilla, molasses and maple syrup. It's not just seasonal; it's uber-seasonal and if your dentist knew you were drinking this beer he'd either have a heart attack or buy a boat.

Has a brown ale base. It tastes like a Belgian mixed with its advertised raw maple sweetness and punctuated by a sour finish. Wow. It's a mouthful, (that's what she said) and I felt overwhelmed. I had trouble finishing a full glass and secretly hoped I had a rare glass with a drinking problem, who would make the intense beer disappear. To provide some defense for Autumn Maple, Nick G really loves this beer and stands by it, but he's a wild man who makes Chuck Norris look like Johnny Appleseed. 

I love The Bruery but I feel like they're reaching with this Promethean concoction. For lacking a desire to finish the glass (but doing so because we have rules dammit), TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

Napa Valley Wedding Day 2 - Napa Smith Pilsner

Sunrise Napa Valley. Riddle me this, had I just woken up or was I just making it to sleep?

So I met with a gaggle of friends including Katie M, Billy D, Emily S, Katie B and Farbod, who needs no last initial (He's like Plato, Seal, McLovin or Sting. Especially like Sting) and forwent the expensive breakfast buffet for a rumored small cafe. Not only was the meal tasty and cheap but to my delight, I came across another Napa Smith brew, the Pilsner. Breakfast beer, yessssss.

Katie B's floating head. What a mug!

Whilst my Huevos Rancheros con extra salsa was just what the doctor ordered, the Pilsner was not. Pilsner is tough to make and I will Napa Smith credit, they made grape beer taste good. However, this fellow is a fairly ubiquitous pilsner and there's not much more to say, other than it lacked taste and goodness and it's hard to compete with the Germans in wine country. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

We went wine tasting in the afternoon and then onto the main event, Lauren and Chris's wedding!

Wedding on a golf course, b-e-a-utiful

Steel Reserve 211

Over the Summer I developed a healthy obsession with CASTLE and Monday it came back! I'm stoked about this as well as the highly anticipated BOARDWALK EMPIRE, which has begun its short but sweet run. Whilst David was Lederhosing it up in Munich, I bought the 24oz Steel Reserve at the grocery store for $1.79. I'd never heard of it and being cheap, I considered it an apt choice until David's return. Seeing it upon Tuesday night however, David was previously aware of its existence and offered his opinion:

Fall TV is back with a bang

"Isn't this a joke beer?" he inquired. I shrugged and chuckled but secretly I was worried a cobra with steely reserve was going to pop out and bite my eyeball when it was opened. My mind goes to dark places. Why didn't I think the beer would tickle my funny bone with a humorous pun instead? Damn, I should've been on drugs.

So I didn't think it was that bad - for malt liquor. If I was at gun point in an Inglewood convenience store and the robber asked me to pick out some dank malt liquor that was above 8.1% alcohol for his Boo, I'd pass up an Old English or a Mickeys and swipe this one. But in terms of good beer? Not so much.

This my midnight purchase. See, if I was going to a late night BYOB hootenanny or hoedown wearing flannel and ready to party like a hobo with a beer accessorized by a brown sack, I'd pick this fella out of the lineup. It's Natty Light's bigger stronger cousin or as I will henceforth call it, the "I don't care it's late" beer. For it's cheapness and ability to party at a whim's notice, TRANSFORMERS 2. 

P.S.
I always have to point out stuff like the following out because it's offensively obvious. Beer and marketing. It's fascinating and insulting at the same time. You're really writing "extra malted barely a select hops for extra gravity" on the can? You know what gravity refers to? It refers to the specific gravity of the wort or must at various stages in the fermentation - fermenting alcoholic beverages. See unless you're a brewer, gravity is not a familiar term and it's just a buzz word to the common folk. Marketing might as well throw in buzz words from the original Batman played by Adam West, who would say such zingers as "Kapow! Kabluey! Whammo!"

Here's an odd fact for you. The geniuses at Miller Light who made this beer coined the marketing term 'high gravity', but Anheuser-Busch liked the word so much they created the Hurricane High Gravity Lager with a similar price point. Yuck. Thank you Jebus for microbrew beer.

Watching Monday Night Football with Friends on a freaking WALL TV is much better than Moretti La Rossa Birra Doppio Malto

Monday Night Football was on and I went over to Twister M's house to watch the Saints eeeck out a game against '49ers with his roommate Adam on their ENORMOUS wall TV. I loved their set up. 1080p HD projection with surround sound that vibrated my couch back. Color me impressed.

One bad bitch of a TV

Despite my slight affection for The Saints, I was hoping the beleagured San Francisco team would pull off an upset, but Drew Brees proved why he's the bomb in the final 1:30 and pulled out a W.

The Moretti La Rossa is a Doppelbock that pours a dark amber and smells of caramel and heavy malts. It has an even bigger sour malt taste and didn't finish well. I lived in Italy a full year and never had this fella and don't recall ever seeing it either (the original Moretti, certainly, but not this). The sour malt stayed with me until after I returned home. Blerg. Better luck next time 49ers, and Moretti I can't help but rate you TRANSFORMERS 2.

Stone Ruination Double IPA with Amarillo Hops, Cask Conditioned

Like a tsunami, the smell of Axe body spray in a gym locker room and large women at R Kelly concerts, this beer is overwhelming. David and I went out to the Daily Pint Saturday night with Aaron B, Nick G and his special ladyfriend / ball-and-chain, depending on the moon's phase.

My Mouth Exploded

Marry me Margaret Thatcher! This was an apocalyptic beer. The cask conditioning is evident in smell and taste, as it heightens the already pronounced hops. Seriously, it's Southbound and down, all aboard for the train to HOPSVILLE. And by Hopsville I mean a swimming hole brimming with hopst. Smell and taste are bitter like a lemon, lemon, lemon and it lingers like the Russian Front in World War II. Confederate Calvary General Stonewall Jackson supposedly ate lemons whole for health and vitality. He'd enjoy this beer, that crazy bastard. If you haven't figured out, this hopstacular wasn't very balanced. It's outrageous. If this beer was an art piece, it'd be in the experimental section of the Tate Modern in London.

Stone, you have my respect for pushing the limits. However, this is a specialty beer and only for those bold, bold drinkers who like to have their head explode once in a blue moon. For me, once in a lifetime is enough. TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

**Special shout out to Aaron B, who rallied to join us after a full day of Wizardry. This man rolls deep:

He is no longer Gandolf the Gray. The transformation is complete; he is now Gandolf the White.

Eye Of The Hawk, KYAAAAH! From Mendocino Brewing Co

Eye of the Hawk sounds like an excerpt from those misleading motivational speeches made by my basketball coach during middle school, home of the Spring Branch Eagles.

David brought this in after a coworker threw a party and the hawk's were the sole survivors, a dubious distinction. Straight from Ukiah, Californa, the hawk pours a reddish/amber color and has a caramel malt taste. However...

Survivor's new single: "It's the eye of the hawk and the thrill of the pitcher's balk, rising up to the mistakes of our rivals."

However, it has a strange aftertaste. And it's not good strange, like going to the gym drunk. But it's also not weird strange, as in grandpa obsessively watches the WNBA. No...it's peculiar, like Goth kids who also play varsity football.

As you can tell I'm having trouble placing the taste. However, regardless of my questionable tasting faculty, the fact is I didn't quite enjoy this ale. Yet if this was the last beer in a party cooler, I would never not drink it (double negative, count it!). TRANSFORMERS 2.

Firestone DBA

A Double Barreled (DBA) English Pale Ale. But the beer was flat. Shame. Disregarding the flatness, I still didn't like you.

You reminded me of that student in middle school who was really nice but despite her best intentions, asked really stupid questions during all-school assemblies. While being earnest, you still prolonged the torture and for that we disliked you strongly. Firestone DBA, all I can say is, blerg. TRANSFORMERS 2.

Unibroue Raftman - Whiskey Malt Beer, It's...Different

This is what the Unibroue website says regarding the 'legend' of Raftman:

"Unibroue commemorates the legendary courage of the lumberjacks and log drivers of yesteryear. During their long months away from home, these hardworking men would get together and settle their differences over beer and whiskey, which are both made with malted barley. Unibroue had a great idea when it decided to bring the two together!"

Warning Lumberjacks: Do not drink and log-roll

I know Unibroue is Canadian, but that's still a cheesy idea, eh? I'm looking forward to their next beer celebrating the lives of entrepreneurial Fur Trappers and brave soldiers who battled the redman during the Beaver Wars in the 1600's. Hmm. Still, my expectations were high because I love whiskey. Whiskey, whiskey whiskey. What the lumberjacks 'settled their differences over' is what we kids now call a 'boilermaker,' named after Purdue University (*citation needed). It's a shot of whiskey dropped into or tossed back with a pint of beer. It's perfect for celebrations, becoming newly single, funerals or Thursday Nights.

Poured, the Raftman appears as an amber ale and tastes like one initially. But I couldn't get around this aftertaste. Eck is all I could muster. I don't know how to even describe the taste. I looked online and surprisingly, there are only a few who agree with me. To my aghast, it's rated fairly well. Still, every sip produced a cringe and pairing it with food wouldn't change my negative attitude.

Out of the three Uni beers tasted thus far, two of them have been busts. I will leave final judgment out until tasting the final beer, but as David suggested in the Ephemere post, I'm pretty certain that Unibroue packaged the four beer Variety Pack - sold in Trader Joe's - because they couldn't successfully sell them individually. Maybe Raftman sells really well with Axemen, but consider yourself warned: TRANSFORMERS 2 rating.

Unibroue Éphémère aka Granny Smith Apple Beer

It's simple. I like apples. I like beer. Combine the two and it becomes Ephemere. Maybe it's not such s a good idea.

Unibroue uses chambly fundamentally in several beers, much like George Lucas used Star Wars IV-VI as a platform to launch episodes I-III. Now, some good things happen. Noire de Chambly. Yoda flying around kicking tail. Natalie Portman is beautiful (my intern just asked me if that was necessarily relevant and I stabbed his arm with my letter opener). Some aspects that are extensions of the original are the opposite of, let's say, good. For example Jar-Jar Binks, I wish you never existed.

Here the perfectly Canadian folks at Unibroue decided to mix their delicious white ale with a green apple flavor, and it's just too much. Every sip was followed by a frown. The only thing I can say after drinking this is, congratulations on your beer being as good as TRANSFORMERS 2.