Victory Saison du Buff makes rosemary a rock star

So I went to the doctor this morning. I hadn't been since September, a month after we started drinking a beer every day. Wanna guess who gained 10 lbs? This guy! You can't tell by looking at me, but somewhere, hiding, beneath my epidermis is the effect of 200+ beers. It's not like I'm at the point where I'm calling up Curves, asking what their monthly specials are, but it's time to realize I'm not 23, I work a desk job, and salad's are not the enemy (*note* If you put Raspberries in my salad though, I might turn into the Incredible Hulk's bigger and meaner Brother, Magnus Hulk). I still have 150 beers left and speedo season is just around the corner, as Nick G reminds me every other day, so here's to eating healthy and drinking growlers of beer.

On that note, look at the giant beers I bought at The Bruery Saturday. I've already counted them for the year and will only be drinking for pleasure. Heyyy

Three truly unique and delicious brews

I'm back on track with the collaboration beers after the brewery trip interrupted my planned three consecutive San Diego involved collab beers. This one is from Stone Brewery, Dogfish Head, and Victory out of Pennsylvania and it's an herb centric beer. If Dogfish is involved, you know it's going to be a little wacky.

Clocks in at 6.8% alcohol. The rosemary hits you strong upfront like cheap perfume. It's intense (more on this later).

I had a triple white sage beer from Craftsman at the LA Beerfest and it was amazing. Craftsman also made a lavender beer and it was unappealing. I feel the biggest factor for herb centered beers is the role of the herb. Is it used as a centerpiece and the beer revolves around it? Or does it take a backseat to the body of the beer and play a supporting role, a Robin to the beer's Batman? I believe in the latter and I think that's the more sensible route. It's the same way with cooking - you don't have rosemary for your main meal, it's used as a part of the main meal.

But these guys are professional brewers and they don't-give-a-shit about being sensible, especially Sam Calagione from Dogfish, who is a wild man. This Rosemary centered beer blows my little philosophy out of the water. It's really good, wow. It's definitely something to try, and it has a bright label so you can't miss it at Whole Foods ($3.50). TRANSFORMERS rating



I'm usually very beer-centric on the blog (and like to overuse the word 'centric'), but every so often Jebus presents an opportunity impossible to pass up and not post about. Ladies and Germs, today that opportunity is spelled S-H-E-E-N.

"I'M ON A DRUG. IT'S CALLED CHARLIE SHEEN
http://livethesheendream.com/

Here are several additional gems, but there are so, so many more on the above website:

"SORRY MY LIFE IS MUCH MORE BITCHIN' THAN YOURS. I PLANNED IT THAT WAY."

"I EXPOSED PEOPLE TO MAGIC"

"I AM A WARLOCK"


"CLEARLY I HAVE DEFEATED THIS EARTHWORM WITH MY WORDS"

"I AM AN F-18"

"ROCK BOTTOM? THAT'S A FISHING TERM"

"THE RUN I WAS ON MADE SINATRA, FLYNN, JAGGER AND RICHARDS LOOK LIKE DROOPY-EYED ARMLESS CHILDREN"



If you feel like taking the blue pill and having your reality checked, take this 10 question quiz and choose whether the quotes are  either Charlie Sheen or Muammar Gaddafi (thank you brother Warren) -->
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/quiz/2011/mar/01/muammar-gaddafi-charlie-sheen-quiz

Bootlegger Brewery's Knuckle Sandwich should win an Oscar

I've been waiting for this day to arrive for quite some time...No, not the Oscars you half-witted scruffy-looking nerf herder. To use my over-sized novelty champagne flute, duh.

 

That flute is 2.5 feet tall, it's freaking ridiculous, I love it. I'm hosting an Oscar party tonight and everyone is dressing up as if they are attending the event itself. I picked up the Knuckle Sandwich at Bootlegger's yesterday and I'm beside myself with excitement.

 

The brew is Bootleggers' most celebrated beer, but they only make it in limited quantities. Um, why would you do that to us? What are we, ants? It needs to be three times that! Well Derek Zoolander, what's interesting about this fellow is it's made from their leftover hops. So whatever hops are leftover after they brew all their other beers they save up until they have enough for the Knuckle Sandwich. Being a Double IPA means it requires LOTS of hops. Translation for all this - they make this in small batches and not very often. But guess what? They just released a batch this week. Being at the brewery yesterday for Nick and AJ's birthday was fortuitous.

David welcomes our guests at the door

It's a phenomenal beer. For being 10.5% alcohol and a Double IPA, this beer is as smooth and balanced as a Formula 1 Racer. It has a sweet malt mouthful followed by rounded citrus and piney hops. It's a Mike Tyson Knockout. BAD BOYS rating.

Seriously Bale, stop stealing my look or I will find you and lock you out of the Oscars...again

Add caption

So I drank out of my Scepter/Shrek's Champagne Flute all night. It was kinda awesome. Although I didn't win the Oscar pool (damn you Rucker!) the party was a fantastic success and I (at least) had an amazing time. In order to capture the party and its beautiful guests, everyone posed for a picture using it as a prop. The results are glorious. Check out the fanfare below:

The Hosts. We also doubled as Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin's stand-ins last year

Don't throw Nic a fastball

Jessica is the Belle of the Ball. Oscar Queen anyone?

Settle down Brad, your jeans are getting acid washed

The glass gets in the way every time Melissa. Mother Rucker!

Kym teaches a course on drinking daintily out of absurd glasses. Her secret? Channeling Dame Helen Mirren

Watch out for AJ, this kitty's got claws

That glass isn't your teddy bear Tierney.

Heyyy! Is Tiffany holding the glass or is the glass holding her?

Ellen knows where the good shit is

Tamara drinks like a boss

What is she doing? Hey Rachel Lohan, don't steal my crystal glassware.

Glen was an extra in MILK three years ago and he's hasn't broken character since. Suck it Colin Firth.

Jerren's a glass half-full kind of guy, but this is pushing it

Bruery Provisions Cornballer isn't as...a-maize-ing...as I hoped

The day has finally come that Nick G can make it to The Bruery. This man is one of the biggest fans of this heavenly beer and now, he pilgrimages to his Mecca. What's the occasion? He and AJ share a birthday and to celebrate, we're doing a brewery tour. We're joining several of Nick's coworkers as well as Karl who is coming up from Temucla after wine tasting, if he's still vertical. On the way up, we listen to a birthday mix I made for Nick and AJ and in case you were wondering, Oingo Boingo was definitely on it. The video is one of Danny Elfman's finest moments -

The timing of this trip is excellent, because according to The Bruery newsletter, they're releasing their fifth and latest Provisions Series batch today (Provisions is a limited one time only release) AND Bootleggers Brewery is releasing their greatest creation ever, the very limited release Knuckle Sandwich DIPA. Victory is ours!

Best Friends and Beard Brothers - at least that's what it says on our eharmony profile

Going brewery tasting is fun for the obvious reasons, but this trip doubles the fun for me because all the people except for Nick know nothing about The Breury or Bootleggers, so I'm allowed to ramble on and wave my hands uncontrollably while explaining everything I know about their beer. Imagine if you gave a 10 year old kid Redbull and a plate of cookies and that's how excited I am. Finally, someone clubs me over the head like a baby seal and my I shift my focus to the beer of the day, the Cornballer.

Bruery has some pretty great names for their specialty brews (Gunga Galunga, a Caddy Shack reference, being the best) and this one brings back fond memories of infomercials from Arrested Development (unfortunately the above is the best I can find)

And let me tell you how much I enjoyed it...eeeeeeee not so much -

Eat sink, cornballer (I didn't flush it, but God I wanted to)

I love The Bruery. I have been there four times. I own two growlers. I have several of their beers saved under my bed. I even own a shirt and will probably buy a hat next trip. Yay merchandising. I'll probably name my second born son Mischief after their finest brew, but this beer makes me cringe.

The Cornballer is their attempt at a malt liquor and it's 50% of it is made out of corn and the other 50% made out of 6 Row Malt (2 Row Malt is typically used to make beer). It smells like citrus hops mixed with a mildew sock. It tastes similar, with a dash of sourness. There's just something rotten about it. Everyone except for Karl agrees with me. Karl likes this, but he's also high on mescaline and wine.  I love so much about brewery, but not this. This was hard as a horse to put down. I never thought I would bestow the worst rating to a Bruery beer, but stranger things have happened. PEARL HARBOR rating Thanks goodness they still have the Cuadruple on tap, because I'm gonna need a 'forget me now' after this one.

On another note, happy birthday Nick and AJ! I've known them both for over 9 years and they're my two favorite people and I wish them the best birthday and in the year to come!

 

I bought a Loakal Red and a Cuadruple to add to my cellar/bed collection. Nick G went certifiably awesome and bought a CASE of Bruery beer, a baker's dozen to be exact. On a side note, he will soon be the proud owner of a shotgun. Who has two thumbs and can't wait to combine both? THIS GUY

Russian River Rejection makes it all better

I'm stoked - not only is it Friday, as in Surly Goat Friday, but also because exotic Russian River brews are still on tap! Matt, Ri, Tiff, Glen, Rachel and Ross (they were great on Friends) came out for some pints, Foosball and tomfoolery. My Russian River selection is the Rejection, a limited release which they distribute around Valentines Day and to their credit, they have successfully personified the dark side of that holiday.

On your leg

The style is a dark Belgian ale. The flavor profile is dark, roasted malts with a little chocolate and a very nutty taste that's bitter, like really dark chocolate (think 85% + Cacao). If anything, rejection is bitter...Very clever River Russians. This is only 6.1% though, and you'd think they'd make a 'rejection' beer one that would put you on your ass. Like a forget me now from Arrested Development. Where were you when I need you GOB! This isn't a fantastic beer, but it's certainly noteworthy for a seasonal. TRANSFORMERS rating.

I had an imperial red for my follow up beer, the Coronado Red Devil (10%), and it was fantastic, I'm really looking forward to featuring this beer on the website sometime soon.

Brewdog 5AM Saint primes my steakly palate

At The Old Place to celebrate Nick G's 29th berfday with his family. The restaurant is hidden deep in the Santa Monica mountains East of Malibu in the small town where they filmed shows such as M.A.S.H and Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman (David's 2nd favorite rerun show behind The Wonder Years).


The restaurant has been cooking steaks for the last 50 years on the same grill, and their meat has quite the distinctive smokey taste. Also, there is a winery next door which I'd love return during the day and have some wine then follow up with more Noodle & Cheese Bake and Steak - The Old Place menu.

They have a surprisingly pleasant beer list. I dive into one worthy of a steak joint and a Brewdog I haven't seen before.

Um, a little more mood lighting please? I need more darkness

First off, 5am Saint is a great freaking name. Iconoclastic Amber Ale, which is labeled at the bottom, is a bold statement but it's totally backed up. This beer is smooth with a nutty bite and just the right amount of sweetness.  The more I drink the more excellent it becomes. This is the type of Amber Ale I want every other Amber to be. Itg oes well with food too. THE ROCK rating

I finish of this beer before the main course and order an Oaked Arrogant Bastard for the steak, which is a brilliant move on my part. In the future when you grill, find a six pack of the oaked bastardo, it'll do your bbq wonders.


Nick's been my closest friend for 9 years and counting, and like a fine wine or 15 year-old girls, he only gets better with age.

Highway 78 Scotch Ale collaboration is the Brandon Flowers of side projects

I love me some Modern Family. It's consistently hilarious and one of the smartest comedies on TV. Tonight's episode, as do many others, focus on the parental relationships - specifically, how relationships are a give and take of two people who are totally in love but also have distinctly different personalities. Making it work is a real collaboration. Which is perfect because I bought three different collaboration beers to have while David is off watching space shuttles launch. I only wish all relationships troubles could be as funny as Modern Family and as delicious as this Stone, Green Flash Brewing and Pizza Port collaboration.

Collaborations are all the rage this year and I had two big collaborations over Christmas (Weihenstephan Samuel Adams collaboration & Brookly Schneider collaboration) which were very interesting beers. I love that craft brewers are celebrating their...craft....(cheese) instead of being agro and aggressively competitive. Everyone just wants to make delicious beer! Team America....F-yeah.


It's a dank 8.8% (yepee). It's super malty, with hints of chocolate and dark, rich roasted barley and caramel. This is the beer I want to drink driving night time driving across an empty desert road with the windows down...riding in the passenger seat, duh. Still not legal but who's gonna stop me in the desert? An ACME anvil? Pff, I'm not chasing the Road Runner.


What's interesting about these three breweries gathering to brew - as they note on back of the bottle - is they hail from the San Diego region and are all known for being hop-centric breweries. So what did they decide to brew when they came together?  To create one of least hoppiest beer styles around, a Scotch Ale. 


So I am surprised that hop heads made this. These guys are obviously pros who are passionate for all styles of beer, but after allowing the beer to help marinate the ideas floating in my gray matter, I realized the great opportunity this collaboration afforded the three brewers. 

Like any business, each brewery builds up a brand. Stone for example, once you get to know their beer, has a very unique set of hop expectations. This collaboration provides an opportunity for the brewers to to flex their creative muscles and create a beer outside of their established hop heavy brands. This is their side project! Take The Killers for example; they are a pop driven band channeling heavy weights like Joy Division, Morrissey, Springsteen (etc).  Brandon Flowers wanted to create a particular sound that he was passionate about but that is smaller and more focused than what The Killer stand for, so he created a solo project and produced an album 'Flamingo' that he channeled his Vegas-Country voice. It's completely different from The Killer's catalog but is still fantastic and stands distinctly on its' own. 

The actual State Highway 78 is a highway that runs from Oceanside (near San Diego) to Blythe (Central Cali). The Scotch Ale 78 is their solo project, and it's delicious. I might even pickup another one at Whole Foods, because who knows if they'll make another one like this. THE ROCK rating.

Coronado Orange Avenue Wit essentially Blue Moon's my tongue

I've been impatiently waiting for the workday to end and for David to return home to help my transfer my Belgian Red Ale to the carboy: Belgian Red Ale brew day. I'm dying to know how my first original recipe is shaping up and if the malt I burned (through user error during the brew process) can be tasted, or if it's negligible. Crossing my fingers for the later...

Touchdown! Gooooaaaalllll! Schwing, Schiwng, Schwung! During the transfer I fill a snifter up and the prognosis is excellent. It's still really sweet and needs time but the caramel flavor is spot-on as is the belgian sweetness. David and Karl are nodding approvingly as they taste. It's already pretty dank beer and Karl and David point out the sweetness could turn into alcohol, which would be a really good thing for this brew. I'm titillated to say the least and I'm eagerly anticipating bottling day. There is a hint of the bitterness at the end of the sip but it's very small and may disappear all together. We all agree this beer can only get better, and it's good right now. Here's to swimming with bow-legged women.



Karl picked out this Coronado beer, which none of us really know anything about the brewery other than it's in Saint Diego. This orange label is telling me it's a wheat beer brewed with honey and spices. Hmmm

The sexy coaster is a gift David returned with from Germany

This beer is really light and the orange is really mellow. It smells weird, a little musty, like the Old Sock Air Freshner I hang from my rearview mirror. Just kidding, that's no air freshner.

This wouldn't be a bad summertime beer, but some would argue this case for Blue Moon and only girls like the moon that's blue. I'm over it, as is Karl. THE ISLAND rating.

Landbrauerei Schonram Festbier doesn't make my day easier

I picked this up at Beverage Warehouse because it was cheap and seemed obscure, which are both probably bad signs, but something else is on my mind...

Every so often people ask me if I ever get tired of drinking a beer every day. During the first six months, I scoffed at them, but as of recent, there are some days when I really just don't want to have a beer. Don't get me wrong, drinking beer every day is like telling me that if I don't play the Call of Duty video game for the next several hours, then a child will die from cancer, or, that unless I copulate with a intoxicatingly beautiful lady then communism will prevail (God Bless America I say, as the madam wipes a tear from my eye)...

Still, some days I simply want to go to sleep, or like today, I return from the gym having purged myself from the Chipotle and Texas Pecan Pie I gorged on for lunch. My body is begging me not to inhale any other crap except water, but I still have a beer yet to drink...not that beer is crap. It's times like this that I have to remember the end goal and think of the beer as medicine and just throw it down the hatch. Good thing this beer was made for fast consumption.


This beer is a Marzen/Festival Bier. As expected, it was cheap and super malty and has an unexpected bite to it which isn't pleasant. THE ISLAND rating.

Also, Jenga survived the bbq last night. How long will it last?

Anywho, I'm trying to catch up on some old movies and I'm about to watch Barbara Stanwyck in The Lady Eve. Supposed to be great. 

On another note, before I started The Lady Eve, I caught the end of Michael Bay's PEARL HARBOR and even though I rank it last out of his catalog, I feel like the disastrous film wasn't entirely Michael's fault. He may have not been the right choice for an epic historical war film in the first place, but that script was TERRIBLE, just atrocious. Having Alec Baldwin cast as Jimmy Doolittle was an inspired choice and even he had trouble rising above some of the lines. Alec was still awesome though, duh.

Drake's Denogganizer Imperial IPA is the beer support I need for a big BBQ

The rain has stopped and the sun broke through the clouds, so I'm cooking up a big BBQ today. Three stacks of ribs, lines of cider-simmered bratwurst with onions and salmon with red-curry coconut sauce. Having a bunch of people over, mostly old friends but a few new ones as well, Heather, Jamie, Brent, Nick G, Beth, Sara, Josh, Lisa, Jake, Matt and Ri.

David's usually the cook but he's out of town, so I'm going to Emeril this shit up and I'm charging hard. I need a big beer to propel me through the day and Drake's comes through once again.

Deliciousness!

I love Drake's and at 9.75%, this beer is big and bad. This is more malt than IPA, but it's a bold malt and an accented bitterness. The beer may be dank but it's finely tuned. Love this and would love to create a home brew inspired by this. THE ROCK rating.


If the Discovery Channel was on hand filming the day, they would have mistook my friends for Jackals because all three racks of ribs were gone within the first half hour. Only a pile of cleanly picked bones were left as evidence of their existence. The Bratwurst and Salmon were met with love by everyone as well, and later we played Jenga while I finished off an Arrogant Bastard. Beautiful Day indeed and except for the war zone that is my kitchen, I'm one happy camper.

To Josh, Heather and Lisa for helping out with the curry sauce and manning the grill whilst I played host and/or boozed, thank you so much for your help!

Allgauer Teutsch Pilsner is the base for a Hollywood night

In Westwood with Jamie pre-partying for a bus ride in the cold rain to Hollywood for a going away party. Gonna be interesting, gonna be great!

This pilsner isn't that clear, it's a little bitter and over all it's not that great. But it was cheap, what did I expect? TRANSFORMERS 2 rating, don't waste your time - there are much better pilsners out there. 


...A quote from later on...The bus driver told us, "didn't know stars rode his bus." Ha totally, he's so right. How did he know I was famous Lesson learned, wear a sport coat and you'll get compliments on buses.

Russian River Mortification dissolves my sobriety but not my foosball skills

Friday night at Surly Goat is in full swing with Matt and Ri but sanz Tiffany. I started out with a Red Velvet Ale from Eagle Rock on the happy hour menu and it's really, really good. I can't wait to have it as my beer of the day.

While waiting for others to arrive, I rope two guys in, Charlie and Cameron, to play foosball 1 vs. 2. Turns out Charlie played football at Rice for a year and we talked about Houston for a while. I also discovered that both these guys can destroy the $4 well drinks the Goat offers. If they had four hands, they'd have four drinks. Party on

Love the sign, but the Mortification sure as hell ain't Pabst

Matt and Ri arrive and we set up a seminar at the Foosball table. We set up a clinic and rage for, maybe close to two hours while 80's hair music jams continuously. It's a blur. Halfway through I go for my beer of the day and pick a Russian River because a couple days ago they had the breweries up for a pouring/tasting. I spy the Mortification on tap, a dank 10.5% cuadruple. This is my third or fourth cuadruple in as many weeks (I didn't even know they existed a month ago), and I jump to have it.

The Mortification is a great name for a cuadruple. There's a strong malt chocolate taste mixed with dark fruits. It's not very complex and the alcohol is very apparent, but it's good. I love rich foods - dark chocolate, sinfully chocolate cake - and so I love these dank ass cuadruples. They're bold and rich and help me forget my scruples, darn cuadruples. TRANSFORMERS rating.

Ri and Matt ordered Baby Blues BBQ for dinner and I got some cornbread, which was exactly what the doctor ordered after the 10.5%. I introduced Matt to Pliny the Elder and his mind exploded. Another convert! Notch up another great success at the Surly Goat.

Alesmith My Bloody Valentine doesn't taste like sweets or blood, lonely fat people and vampries disappointed

Out for a late evening award winning Father's Office Cheeseburger with Jamie when I noticed this recently released Alesmith seasonal on tap, My Bloody Valentine. There are so many good beers on tap here, but how could I turn down a name like that?

It smells strangely like perfume and is an odd mix of dark caramel malt, floral notes and citrus hops. I'm put off by the odd mix initially but am warming up after draining it halfway.

When I begin the night with a Pliny the Elder (one of the highest ranked IPA's in the world), it's a tough act to follow. Especially when I could also marry the Father's Office burger and fries. Brown and Amber ales aren't my thing, but this one was an interesting drink. ARMAGEDDON rating

Paulaner Salvator doesn't quite save my day

I don't like the way that AT-ST is looking at me...I have a bad feeling about this. Let's get out of here Han.

Not only did I split a Kogi Quesadilla and Sliders today for lunch, but my office CEO made an executive decision (I kid you not) and replaced the Oreo's in the kitchen with cookies looking exactly like these:

Seriously, who does that? You don't put a free kegerator next to the water cooler when you employ a bunch of alcoholics. You can't give the sluty secretaries in MAD MEN free contraceptives, right? I have a cookie problem; how could you, in good conscious, replace Oreo's with this crack? They might as well put out black tar herion and some clean needles every morning. I had two today. This is only the beginning.

Anywho, Paulaner Salvator has a whole lotta bock going on with deep brown nut and caramel roast.  It's a double bock and it's a little too intense for me, and it's not my style. THE ISLAND rating.

Seriously though, I kinda wish the AT-ST slayed more Ewoks in Return of the Jedi. This isn't helping:

Ommegang BPA Belgian Style Pale Ale mixes it up with Karl, who loves Cheese

Karl's here and he loves Cheeeeeese, in case you were wondering. Instead of Karl Thursday Night beer, we're doing it tonight, Tuesday. Karl is going to Europe in May and laying out the details to the recently finalized, which includes a wine festival in the Ron Burgundy area, known for their wine and blueberry colored suits, and then cavorting through Germany with more festivals. He also plans to visit a Belgian Abbey at some point. I hate Karl.

Just kidding, how can I hate a face like that?

The last of Karl's New York brothers Ommegang package, he originally purchased it believing it was the Double Belgian Ale (DBA), rather than the Belgian Pale Ale (BPA). Who said Dyslexia wasn't a real condition?

Ommegang is mixing styles here and the result is just as advertised. The BPA is super carbonated with a bready and malty taste that is also light and sweet, like a pale ale. The unfamiliar style mix took me by surprise initially, but I really enjoyed it after a few sips. David hates his beer, but Karl and I like it. TRANSFORMERS rating.  This beer is similar to a 'diet' drink, which promises the same taste without the calories or sugar. This beer tastes like a Belgian but is as light and smooth as an American Pale Ale.

Karl's take on the beer is, "BPA is a pale that's not real wimpy. It has a Belgian Golden taste but it's softer on the palette." He is always more eloquent than me. I really hate Karl.

Sierra Nevada Hoptimum, whole cone imperial IPA, oh hey Evan!

I was still pretty jet lag slagged today, tried to get as much done as possible, but it was also Ned's birthday - not going to make it easy to concentrate when you've got dank cake to sort out at work. Came home at 5 and took a nap. Then Even came by, great surprise. This was unexpected because he was supposed to be halfway to Antarctica, but he had bike problems and came back to SoCal to get some parts. He already has an apartment in Cabo and had been living in his tent on the beach for awhile. What a gangster.

Hoptimum is even more dank than when I first tried it at the El Segundo Whole Foods beer fest (which was amazing). Combo of the huge hops and the high alcohol are really intense. Even with the excellent balance, the oily bitterness is still hard to escape. Excellent Imperial IPA, will look for this very soon before it's all gone.

This is Jon Stewart. Bitter, biting, witty, strong, hilarious after only a few run-ins. Jon Stewart, as a beer should no doubt enjoy the same commanding character he enjoys in real life.

Between Sierra Nevada Hoptimum Imperial IPA and Texas Pecan Pie, who needs a Valentine?

It's Valentine's Day blah blah blah shards. Real Men (*citation needed) spend a Bromantic Night drinking beer, eating pie, bottling delicious home brew and enjoying the company of a couch surfing friend Evan - who has spent the last two months on the Mexican Coast living in a beach tent and is currently regaling us with stories which make me want to call him names like "jerk face," "asshole," "god damn you," and "sure you don't need a party buddy?" (real friends don't let other friends party with beautiful strangers, duh).

And my first valentine Momma Davis sent her favorite fat kid a Pecan Pie. That's Texas love. 

So good once it touches the lips

David purchased this after tasting it at the Whole Foods Beer Festival and it is phenomenal.  This is up in the pantheon of Double IPA's alongside Stone Ruination. Classic Sierra Nevada body with an incredibly smooth but incredibly hoppy flavor. There's an interesting bite in the middle of my sip, like a hop spike, that's fleeting and adds an interesting characteristic to the taste.

This is DANK. It is Original Gangster Dank. It's 10.4% alcohol (which I don't taste at all) and it's over 100 IBU's. I mean, wow. Shenanigans. I'm pulling my hair out in delight. BAD BOYS rating. Seriously, pick it up.


If I can get off that boner coaster, David and I bottled our second home brew together, the Belgian IPA. We knew from tasting it during the primary to secondary fermentation transfer, that the brew is still a working recipe and we need to step up the malt/fermentables for the next batch.

With our tasting today, we forecast the brew to be 'pretty decent.' It's not there yet because the hops to malt ratio isn't where we want it, so it'll be pretty hoppy but hopefully not overwhelmingly so. I'm also crossing my fingers that the bottle conditioning / carbonation will bring out the hop aroma, because it's not very strong right now. The greatest surprise is the beer's clarity. It's fantastic and I couldn't ask for anything clearer. It's pretty close to a Houblon Chouffe:

 

This result is from either the wort cooler I picked up before the last batch or the Fascist-isque temperature control in my room, or both. Regardless, I'm proudly pleased with the final product. Two Mondays from now we'll taste and see what's in store. Best Valentine's Day in a long, long time. 

The Original Steiglbock finishes off an eventful day making Home Brew #3

Ever since the success of my first home brew, the winter ale King Moonracer's Revenge, I've been telescopically focused on making two beers, a Belgian IPA and a hoppy Belgian Red Ale, which is inspired by The Breury's Loakal Red. We're bottling the Belgian IPA Monday. It's time to make the Belgian Red.

This is only my third home brew but I want to be ambitious in my beer-every-day year, so I rather than follow anyone's recipe I designed my own. I did a lot of research on malt and hops and decided on specific grains that will give the light and medium caramel malt flavor as well as the 'red' color I want, and then throw several grains characteristic of Belgians that will add sweetness and a big malt body to compliment the strong American hop presence. Where I really diverged is with the yeast. I researched a few Belgian Red Ales and most of them used Irish or English yeast. I really want that Belgian sweetness and ester complex that I enjoy so much, so I'm going the road less traveled with a Belgian Strong Ale Yeast and crossing my fingers.

UNTITLED BELGIAN RED ALE

Malt Extract:    Alexander's Pale Extract   6 lbs
                       Coopers Plain Light DME 2 lbs

Sugar:              Belgian Light Candi Sugar 1 lb

Grain Bill:         Caramel/Crystal Malt 40 L 6 oz
                        Caramel/Crystal Malt 60 L 6 oz
                        Belgian Special B 2oz (this is a really dark grain)
                        Caravienne Malt 4 oz                       

                        Aromatic Malt 4 oz            

Hop Schedule: Centennial (10.5%) .5oz at 60 mins
                       Centennial (10.5%) .5oz at 45 mins
                       Columbus(15.4%) .75oz at 30 mins
                       Cascade (6.6%) 1.25oz at 15 mins
                       Centennial (10.5%) 1.5 oz DRY HOP

Yeast:            Wyeast 1388 Belgian Strong Ale
                    

Potential Alcohol 6.8%
59 IBU's 

Starting Gravity 1.068

Color is 12 SRM (Copper/Red is 10-14 SRM).

Not only is this recipe my own creation, but I'm also making beer without David's guiding hand for the first time. David's in Munich so Tiff is thankfully helping me out.

Wort chiller? Check. Newly built spice rack? Check. Linus the Storm Trooper Cookie Jar?...Time to brew

Always have to drink a beer during brewing so I bought a Drake's Imperial Red Ale to inspire us. God that stuff is good.

Brewing was...a learning process today. There were moments of "oh, I was supposed to add the sugar then," and "what's that black stuff coming up?" HA. What could I do? What's done is done. It wouldn't the first time I learned the hard way. So I burned some malt; the worst that will happen is there will be some 'toasted' notes that I wasn't expecting in the beer, but there also may not be any difference. Just gotta wait and see.

So afterwords I'm enjoying today's beer pleasantly surveying my two alcoholic babies. David brought back several brews from Europe and today's brew is from Austria, the Steiglbock.

Belgian Red Ale on the left, the soon to be bottled Belgian IPA on the right

The Steiglbock is an intense lager and my first light colored bock. It has a surprisingly big malt characteristics which are...interesting...but it's not my type of party beer. THE ISLAND rating.


Thanks to Tiff for helping me out! Crossing my fingers, today was a day of many home brewing firsts (good and bad) and as always, excited to taste the outcome.

Steiglbock marks my American return, and the Grammys kinda suck

Started my day in Munich, definitely a little hung over from the house party last night. Had a good flight, got home around 8, unpacked a little then cracked this. As Steigl is a staple of any trip to Austria, figured this would make for a good transition beer.

Can really smell this right away. Has a strong Bock flavor and is fairly high alcohol at 7%, a bit of a warmer. I'm also now realizing I haven't eaten much today, this is going right to my brain via my empty stomach. Not much to say about the Grammy Awards, other than I've been watching them, bluh.

This beer is David Hasselhoff, because Austrians love the Hof and the beer is a bit darker, AND they actually played a Hof song last night and people raged.

ALSO - check out the new sipper. Have been looking to "acquire" a Rocheforte glass for a long time.

Frog's Red Ale on a productive Saturday

So I like to construct things, specifically furniture and the occasional golden calf, and I've made a 5 shelf bookcase, DVD rack, and wine cork table for the hammock. My latest project began in December when David and I became tired of the bazillion spices in the kitchen - rows and rows of them. So I imagined a 'floating' or suspended spice rack and drew one up. I built the posts, glued the shelves, and figured out how to best support the top shelf. Easy peasy. Then I let all the elements sit around for two months, which made an even bigger mess than having all the spices laid out. David is patient but not that patient, and there were times I'm certain he wanted to hurl the thing out the window, and I wouldn't blame home. My construction was stymied because I couldn't tie a mountain climbing knot with the fishing line. I still don't know how I made it to be an Eagle Scout. Anywho, finally I said screw it; it's time to use square knots, the short bus of knots.

So I woke up this morning and went to work tying different lengths over and over until each shelf wasn't crooked and wallah, it hasn't fallen over yet. So I cleaned the apartment, grabbed a Mexican feast and went to the beach solo for some rays and napping. Before I return back, I went to the home brew store for ingredients and then back to the apartment to write. Boom shaka laka! Walker wins today. This is how I should always spend a Saturday.

In preparation for the beer I'm brewing tomorrow, I'm drinking a red ale from from Blue Frog Grog & Grill, which is apparently located in Fairfield, California. I chose it specifically because of the style and it's the exact alcohol percent that my beer will be, 6.7%. The flavor profile is much different than I'm aiming for and it's considerably darker with rich caramels and hints of chocolate. This is red ale is Christian Bale's Batman, darker and over the top. Plus Bale has a red ginger beard. ARMAGEDDON rating.

Paulaner.

"30s Party. In Munich. German. Jaeger. Fat suit."

UPDATE: The above line is all I wrote the night I had this beer at a suburban birthday houseparty just outside Munich. It's not even Oktoberfest and that's as best of an entry as I was interested in dropping at the time. I'm not going to share many details other than it was a new work friend's 30th birthday and everyone was dressed in a 30s theme.

There isn't much of a reason to get elaborate with the Paulaner Original Hell style beer. It's good, but not great. Hopefully no one from Germany reads this. I think there are probably some Germans that think this is their favorite beer.

Clark Gable. Sure, he doesn't have anything to do with Munich in the 30s. But this party did, and I'm not going there...

Drake's Hop Salad distracts me from Foosball but not from awesome handshakes

It's Friday, and I know what time it is...Unhappy Rammed Sheep night! No but seriously, Tiffany actually found out tonight the origin for the bar's name. It came about  because the owners had a failed graphic t-shirt venture and had a large quantity of left over t-shirts available with 'Surly Goat.' So they named their bar after it. I feel like that would be like naming my first born child after my unpublished spec screenplay, the Untitled Dennis Dugan Comedy Project. I still believe they could use my help writing the Grown Ups sequel.

We have a huge group here with Tiffany, Matt, Maryelle and Glen, who brought several more excellent friends. We're having a fairly outrageously good time here and these wonderful peeps are inspiring me to break into Eddie Murphy's golden hit featuring Rick James:

After smelling and tasting this salad o' hops, it's safe to presume they named this beer because it's like a mixed fruit salad, but with hops. There's a complexity of hops here that results in a VERY intense pine aroma and taste. And apparently the Drake's brewers eat their mixed fruit salad with grain vodka, because this IPA clocks in a startling 9% alcohol.

The reviews online are overwhelmingly positive for this brew but I'm not a huge fan, it's not well balanced and is a little intense for me. ARMAGEDDON rating.


Of course I played Foosball tonight with Tiff, Maryelle and Glen. Maryelle and I created a handshake that's almost but not quite as cool as this one. Something to aspire too...

Dogfish Head Palo Santo Marron is strong enough to use as anesthesia

All I can say is, this ain't the first or last time the Philly Cheese truck will save my life after a night at Daily Pint. I'm meeting Nick G and Karl here for some 12% beer from Dogfish Head.

The Palo Santo Marron is a strong dark ale *(strong is putting a little mildly, don't ya think Sam Calagione?) that's aged in Paraguayan Palo Santo wood and the outcome smells like chocolate, and tastes bitter and roasted. For a 12% beer, I can taste the alcohol but it's going down smoothly and I'm the bitterness is growing on me. I'm used to hop bitterness and not a dry, nutty bitterness. That would make this one funky but delicious beer.

Karl equates this to a better version of the Port Brewing Old Viscosity, which I've never had.
All in all, no many can make 12% taste soo good. Welcome to THE ROCK.

We'll be here next Thursday for a free scotch tasting and more beer!

Cuvee Van de Keizer Blauw and Wurstkuche blow my mind

I've been dying to try this restaurant downtown, Wurstkuche, for months now but when I live in the Marina, finding an excuse to be on the far side of downtown LA are few and far between. Then today, few and far between happened when coworker Tiffany invited me to join her for dinner tonight. Yahoo!...is also decent search engine.

This place has exotic beer and sausage. Check out this practically obscenely delicious menu: Wurstkuche Menu. I had the Rattlesnake and Rabbit Sausage with Jalapeno Peppers. To die for. Where do they find this stuff? Last time I encountered rabbit and snake hunting it was playing Oregon Trail on a computer run by floppy disk.

The same Belgian Brewery who makes the Keizer also makes Lucifer Strong Belgian Ale and the Gouden Carolus series. This beer is ridiculously smooth 11% with hints of chocolate and an uber malty caramel flavor. A little Belgian bread and fruit thrown in for good measure. Sure you can taste the alcohol - but who cares? This is one of the BAD BOYS. Drinking this politely over a wild game sausage is one thing; getting drunk on this is another and would be sublime.


Between this beer, my follow up beer the St. Bernardus 12 (a cuadruple, 10.5%) and the exotic snausage my mouth is salivating. Tiffany's hair practically stood on end like she stuck her finger in an electrical socket when she tried the St. Bernardus 12. She will never be the same. I had to drag her away before she attempted rolling away a keg of the stuff.

I don't care if this place is on the far side of the moon, these sausages and beer taps are seeing my face again. Soon. Plus, I ran into a long lost friend Jen B tonight, which was a delightful surprise.

Taps Irish Red after sushi is a an odd choice but...

Ihora sushi in Studio City for dinner and now I'm at Laurel Tavern drinking up a local brewpub turned recent distributor Taps on...tap (I mean, it was too easy, how could I not?). So while Irish Red Ale is an odd choice after eating dynamite scallops, I'm eager to drink any and all red ale because this upcoming weekend, I want to create my own red ale recipe and then brew it. 

Taps Irish Red Ale has a very nutty smell with hints of chocolate. The taste is malrty with nut and a lighter floral note. This isn't what I'm looking to brew but it's a decent Irish red with a big malt flavor. I'm hoping to brew something on the hoppier side. THE ISLAND rating. 

Pyramid Outburst Imperial IPA should be around more often

I'm looking at an apartment in neglect. It's what happens after the dryer barfs two loads of laundry all over my room's floor, when a couple of assholes leave beer glasses everywhere in the living room and when the kitchen begins growing it's own eco-system. I can't wait to discover UnObtanium.


Point is, cleaning is an action that should be done on a regular basis. Pyramid makes three full time beers and a host of seasonal beers. It's time they made the Imperial IPA on a regular basis because it's considerably more enjoyable than their Hefeweizen, Apricot and IPA ale.

This won't change your world but it's a fun drink to ease your night. It's a bold IPA with big caramel malt taste, 8.5% alcohol and strong hops. What's not to like? I wouldn't be opposed to making a beer like this sometime. I wish Pyramid would expand this to year round, I'd buy it up. TRANSFORMERS rating.

Bootleggers Hopinator Hefe with Citra Hops and Vanilla Bean charges to the Super Bowl

After crepes at the Farmers Market, I wished the parents well after a successful weekend and charged over to Charlie and Patti's for their house warming/Super Bowl party.

Charlie's advice to new home owners: Don't throw a Super Bowl party right after you move in. HA, I can imagine...

The Bootleggers Hopinator Hefe is version 2.0 of their 'Old World Hefeweizen' recipe. They took their standard hefeweizen, added vanilla beans and ran it through a 'hop rocket.' This is my first encounter with the device and I only just read about it last week. It's literally a 'hop infuser' and why do I 'keep having to' use freaking 'air quotes' to indicate 'specific words?' Goddammit.

Anyway, looking at the picture above, imagine running newly made beer through a hose into one side and out the other and thus, literally infusing hops into the beer. It's an interesting concept whose specific purpose I don't fully understand, but heyyyy more hops!

Unfortunately the Bootleggers growler went flat, but that isn't stopping me from drinking three cups of it. I like hops and vanilla beans a great deal, so adding them to their already solid hefeweizen produces a tasty treat. Because the vanilla and hops are added post-brewing, the flavors aren't as well rounded and come off stronger than you want, but this simply makes the Hopinator Hefe more of a novelty or specialty beer. TRANSFORMES rating.


I'm rooting for outstanding play by Aaron Rodgers and a defeat for Ben Rapistberger, although as an athlete I would like to acknowledge how good he is - however, his lumberjack beard doesn't help his reputation as a nefarious scallywag. Also, I just devoured lamb balls and the best beef sliders I've ever had - including Kogi beef sliders. Next, more Bruery beer of the Loakal Red and Mischief type. No matter who wins, it looks to be an excellent day.