Thursday, May 5, 2011

Pacifico celebrates Fifth de Mayo


To commemorate the Mexican army's unlikely victory over French Forces at the Battle of Puebla in 1862, Rush Street in Culver City isn't the most Mexican of places, but they do have drink specials and everywhere else is a packed with drunk idiots.

I arrive early and so I saddle up to the bar. Disappointed they didn't have Model Especial, I settled on a Pacifico Lager. Then something that's never happened to me in Los Angeles occurred; two women bought me a drink. Scratch that - two older women with Scandinavian accents bought me a vodka based drink that was served in a martini glass. How did I know they were Scandinavian? Because I'm a cultured individual. To quote Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, 'I have class coming out of my ass.'

So a woman bought me a drink and I'm thinking, Walker you must look really, rediculously good looking today. I mean, duh, thanks for the newsflash Brian Williams. We start conversing, and at one point I let them know I'm meeting other people. I discover that the blonde's name is Marlin, and I'm primed to make all sorts of clever fishing puns when she offers to buy drinks for the girls I'm meeting. Que? You want to buy drinks for girls too? Suddenly I'm not feeling so full of myself.

Guess what does the lovely woman named after a fish with a spear like snout or bill do for a living? She works for Absolut Vodka in Sweden. She then tells me all about the drink she bought for me, especially the vodka. When Tiffany and Jenny arrive, we do more Absolut Citron shots and then the Swedes down their martini drinks and bounce before everyone can get properly acquainted.

Looking back, this foreign lady got me liquored up, pimped out her business, and then bounced. Why can't I meet more women like that? She was, as they say, one in a million. HA.

One of the weird/awkward/fun moments of the evening came with the shot, in which Marlin and her friend serenaded us in a Scandinavian toast that was akin to The League's "Shiva" song...
...only it lasted longer than necessary and was in a foreign language, so we Tiffany, Jenny and I were left standing around uncomfortably as these Swedes raged on clapping and yelling a Swedish cheer during a Mexican holiday party. Totes funny.
If you haven't had Pacifico, chances are you were born in a hut on Nova Scotia. This beer isn't as pervasive as Dos Equis or Corona, but it's close. In the hierarchy beer, my personal opinion is that Corona is the Mexican Lager equivalent to Coors or Budweiser, Dos Equis is a little bit classier, and then Pacifico is a step above that. But they're little steps above each other, like steps built for little people, or leprechauns as the Boston Equality Group (BEG) calls them. In the realm of lagers south of the border, my personal favorite is either a Pacifico or a Modelo (negro or especial). If you in fact haven't had one, drink a Pacifico next time it's hot and sunny...and refrain from telling people you were born in a hut. TRANSFORMERS rating.

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